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.”“You’d just let me go?”“I don’t want you to go, but I won’t keep you by force.If you really want to leave, I won’t stop you.Is that what you want? To leave?” Please say no, please say no, please say no.I held my breath.Was this way too much to ask? Without Jessica to anchor me to the human world, would I have been able to do this? I tried to put myself in his shoes, but failed.I couldn’t imagine really wanting to exist purely as a vampire- living on raw instinct, nesting in a frenzy with no concept of time or place beyond immediate physical need.“I’ll stay.I’ll try.I don’t want to be alone again.”My relief was immediate.I should have known he’d stay.I was panicking, and at least I knew I had Jessica.Chris would have been totally alone.The thought made me shiver.I embraced him then, and it was different.I was present for it, lucid.I felt the tension in him, as well, and I knew he felt the difference.This kiss was more like a kiss between mortals, lovers.As vampires, its just about the bonding.Really, we could be with anyone, one nest-mate is the same as any other.It takes effort to remain grounded in the moment, to really remember who we are joining with.Our first real conversation had given us this- this little bit of awkwardness, reminding us both that we were each kissing a stranger.I could feel him growing hard against me, and reluctantly broke our kiss.I wanted him, but falling asleep here was a bad idea.“Home,” I whispered into his ear.We were in bed in minutes, and made love with a passion that felt real, at least to me.I could not tell if he was still with me, in the moment, or if he was lost to the need.In the end, it didn’t matter.We had sex and then slept, and when we woke it was light.I did not forget my promise to Jessica, and dutifully checked the clock.It was only seven, still way too early for her.I set my alarm to ring at eleven, and snuggled back into Chris.He woke easily and we joined again, more frantically this time, and then passed out once more.When the alarm went off Chris reached for me, but I got up and showered quickly.He followed me in and tried to talk me into one quick fuck in the shower, but I held him at bay.We left and went out to hunt, stopping to pick up fresh bagels which we brought back for Jessica.It was a fairly sunny day, so we were weaker and had to feed several times on the way back.When we finally returned to the apartment, Jessie was just finishing up with the landlord on the phone.He’d told her that if we were willing to take the place next door ‘as is’, and do the cleaning of it, he’d let us have the first month rent-free.She’d agreed, and we promptly broke in to check it out.Luckily, the previous tenants had also been lax about locking their windows, so Chris and I scaled the wall and let ourselves in that way, then opened the door from the inside for Jess.The place was clean, and an exact replica of our current apartment’s layout.Chris and I started cleaning and talking about what we’d need to do to the place, while Jess went to meet the landlord to get the key.When she came back we all sat on the floor of the new apartment, talking.Jessica made lists of ‘things to do’ and ‘things to buy’, while Chris and I shared ideas out loud.It was fun, and we split a vegan pizza between us as we discussed ridiculous ideas for vampire-friendly décor.Jessica’s phone chirped with it’s ‘text message’ tone, and she smiled as she read the screen.She typed back and then looked up at us.“Hey, guys, do you mind if I take off for the night? Rob, Ciera and Alex just found out that this other guy we work with, Connor, is in a band and he’s playing at the off-campus bar.We’re going to crash it, surprise him.They’re picking me up in an hour.”I smiled at her, happy that she was finally able to have a life without worrying about me.“Have fun, Jess, that sounds awesome.”Even Chris smiled at her, probably happy not to have to spend the night socializing human-style.An hour later, Chris and I were packing up my bedroom, moving things into the new place.We’d decided not to re-paint the bedroom, it was already a nice neutral grey-green.We’d cleaned it and moved the bed over already.When the doorbell rang, I froze.I wanted to meet Jessie’s friends, but I was afraid they’d know I was nonhuman [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]